something juicy in the making (part 1) ...

Stage V



Last week I was in a virtual classroom administering an exam. I was lazily sitting on my academically tailored throne, staring at the ceiling, just letting time run its unavoidably fateful course, when I unexpectedly blinked my eyes and instantly found myself standing in the midst of a vast, flawlessly green meadow. I could sense the scalding aliveness below my bare feet. I could smell the pleasantly intoxicating odor of mature summer grass, slowly baked by the best of solar intentions. 

I looked up at the vibrant deep-blue sky. Not a single cloud. I listened. Not a single sound. Eternal, pervasive AUM spread its subtle wings, submerging the entire scenery in its awesome power. An unusually gentle breeze caressed the flickering outer reaches of my soul. Around me—all around me—monumentally stunning ridges intermittently boasted uncontrollable volatility in flamingly enraged volcanic peaks. 

Suddenly I felt a spirited jolt. As my body flared in combustible brilliance, I instantly knew I had to remove all my clothes, including my heavily structured carnal burden, there and then. Completely and invigoratingly naked, buoyant as a peppery heat wave briskly giggling its way toward open air, I instinctively started running, and eventually simply lifted off the ground like a dazzling skillful loon taking hurried flight from placidly clear lake waters. 

I consciously flew up toward the vivid heavens. I shrewdly glided down from impossibly far-flung altitudes. I twisted. I turned. I sparkled. I shimmered. I was positively and emphatically free! I felt the genuinely radiant quintessence of my true nature projected onto that unimaginably pulchritudinous setting. In utter immunity, I ardently celebrated as the pleasantly reassuring bursting heat of the bright afternoon sun thoroughly invigorated my luminously devout being.

Flying way beyond the intricately weaved anatomy of the sacred grasslands, I was able to distinguish a valley within which were sparsely anchored human settlements. Coming a tiny bit closer (still at a safely guarded distance) I could see carefully handcrafted ranch dwellings with their caricatured red roofs and dense white smoke cheerfully rising up from piping-hot chimneys, as well as little fences, little trees, little animals, and little people—everything so conveniently august in its modesty. 

To my left, the astonishing vision of a seemingly interminable winding river, undoubtedly still sculpting geological history by way of a deep, narrow canyon and its newly formed, exuberantly dense forest. I tracked its on-and-off scintillating grooves all the way to the highest peak in the region, no doubt home of its perpetually flowing cradle. 

There I was, on a drunken laissez-faire spree. No impediments. No roadblocks. No discontinuation. Nothing could stop me. I was in full control. If I decided I wanted to live life in abundantly fiery unconditional love, there it was, for the taking. If I wished I had had more time to ask for humble forgiveness, every single sorrowful instant was given back to me. 

I felt like howling to the flame-bearing solar omnipresence. And I did. I felt like talking to myself. And I did. I felt like crying. And I did. I felt like laughing. And I did. I made thorough use of my effulgent freedom. 

Next, in a scorching eruption of euphoria, I spectacularly somersaulted in mid-air multiple times, and then spent the rest of the afternoon consumedly folding and unfolding my body in curiously unimaginable ways.

By five o’clock I had become conclusively conflagrant. I blazingly zoomed back to my enchanted meadow, landed softly on the sweet ground, and lay down in awe as early traces of igneous twilight slowly consumed formerly magisterial heliacal ubiquity. Bathing in amiable warmth, I closed my eyes and dozed off in candied bliss. 

When I woke up, the sun was nearly setting. Breathtaking lights delicately tinged the multicolored Western sky in anticipation of the majestic eventide, soon to embrace the land. Crickets had already begun their carefully synchronized evening serenade. I could also hear the occasional frog call preceding a soon-to-come full-blown symphony. I knew it was time to go. 

Expanded, renewed, unburdened, I put on my valle lacrimarumuniform and beamed toward daily consciousness. As I awoke in the virtual classroom, I immediately noticed that every single one of my students was gaping at me in utter and complete disbelief.

Copyright © 2019 Intimate Mantra, LLC. All rights reserved



something juicy in the making (part 2) ...


An Intimate Dialogue On Free Will


I am strongly inclined to believe there is no such thing as free will.

Good for you.

Let me reason this out. On a basic level, the term “free will” generally refers to my ability to consciously choose in a specific event or situation. 


Now, for free will to exist on this fundamental stage, there needs to be “someone” who is present to make the decisions, right? 

If you say so…

Here is where I encounter my first issue. As I look very hard and try to detect this “someone” within, all I encounter are components, not the whole. I come across thoughts. I find emotions. I stumble upon sensations. It is a very peculiar thing. I search and search and search but simply cannot find the gestalt, the one who is perceived as more than the sum of its parts. Why then does it seem that there is “someone” who makes a decision? 

Let me tell you right off the bat that your preliminary examination is legitimate. This sense of self you call “someone” is nothing but a construct, an illusion created as a backlash to predisposition, a set of beliefs reinforced by environmental responses to stimuli perceived as pain or pleasure.

Ouch. Intriguing, but complicated. I’m in the dark. 

Bear with me here. As a young child, you tended to repeat behaviors that led you to pleasure and avoid those that caused you pain. 

It’s only natural, right? 

It’s a self-preservation thing. As you seemingly journeyed through experience, these repetitions turned into deeply ingrained grooves that became your preferred routes toward contentment and away from hurt. By sheer force of habit, the bundled packets of thoughts and emotions that comprised your favorite pathways eventually gravitated towards a common center—a “me” thought—which instinctively started creating sense out of the entire thing while feeding on energy of attention. The resulting mess is what you call “someone,” complete with its stories, interpretations, justifications, motives, judgments…and a life. 

So that’s how the human apparatus works. That’s just the way we are.

Yes, sir. Undeniably lame. 

I see. So I may have been wrong in assuming that there is no such thing as free will. Even though this “someone” I call “me” is a deceptive appearance, it does exist, yes? 

Well, yes and no. Here’s the thing. As I told you before, this “decision maker” consists of autonomous bits that came together for the sake of evolutionary convenience. As such, it is like a large group of people, a crowd. Does a crowd exist as a thing? 

Hmm. Not really.

The individuals that make up a crowd are certainly there, but the collective entity has no independent existence. It is only an event. It is the result of unconsciously coordinated motives. 

A very strange phenomenon indeed!

There’s more. Individuals can apparently act, but a crowd is only capable of reactions, a crowd can only resist. 

Okay. I think I see where you’re going with this. You’re saying that the decision maker exists—albeit as a robotic process—and as such can only produce a conditioned response. 

Exactly. After many years playing the same songs over and over again, you started taking the individual sources for granted and began to see the imaginary collective “agent” as a decision catalyst. In other words, your habits, your likes, your dislikes, even your outer and inner discourses eventually become impromptu-like, but while you believe you’re acting from a perspective of independence and free will, your entire life is in reality based on pre-defined tendencies.

Makes sense!

This is a very clever mechanism. It strengthens and perpetuates itself by subtly making you forget that your present behavior is actually based on past interpretations. It creates a sort of unconscious competence.

Like when we have had so much practice with a skill that it has become second nature. Like driving or riding a bicycle.

Yep, but in this case it is not really an advantage. Whenever you believe you’re acting on free will, in reality you’re reacting with your same old song and dance. You just don’t notice it. You believe you’re making a choice, but that’s just another defense mechanism designed to keep the entire apparatus going. At this level, you will invariably choose in accordance with your ingrained patterns.

So it’s true. There’s no such thing as free will.

I wish I could say it was that easy. Automation can most surely be overcome at this level.

Really? How?

Let’s just say for now that by consciously remaining present with your patterns while they are doing their thing, you will naturally distance yourself from identification and sooner or later see them for what they really are: mere stories. You will no longer suffer their influence and your life will then be seen from a detached perspective, as if it were happening to someone else. 

Aha! If I can rid myself of these programmed reactions, deep down I really do have a choice after all.

Sorry. Not really. Remember how I mentioned that your repetitive patterns, along with the “me” thought, comprise that fictitious someone? Well, as you integrate these patterns, this very strong and obvious sense of being a person begins to expand and diminish in density—it begins to fade away. Thus, as you further free yourself from this bondage, this burden, and reinstitute your ability to choose freely, you’ll unexpectedly find that there really is no one left to make the decisions. Now, in the absence of a subject, the choices just happen.  

Wu wei!

Copyright © 2019 Intimate Mantra, LLC. All rights reserved



something juicy in the making (part 3) ...



Now I know. Now I think I know. Now I know I think I know who I am. I belatedly realize myself within my very own insightful depths. Nothing much. Really. A perspective. Just expression. Expression. Expression. And truth. Omnipotent truth. All-encompassing truth. Unmediated truth. Meekly radiating small portions of divine thrust. I am the source, supreme. I influence and am influenced, unbeknown. Sensory inferences gravitate towards a vivid fountain, an obvious source. Absolute. Sovereignly incomparable. But it’s only a speck!

That’s okay. I know. 

I sing the body, magnetic. I sing the glory, unhindered. I sing luminosity in countless ways. I sing the corner light. I sing in a penumbra of secrecy. I sing in dazzling yellow. Vivid red. Blue, blue and much more blue. I sing and I am the source, supreme. 

Heat. Energy. Intensity. Efficiency. I am pure, relative coolness. I hear merry tintinnabulation. I delight in historical acumen. I imbibe in uncommon common sense. I play a leading role. I am a producer of sorts. I write long scripts. I direct from afar. 

Far from finished. No room for a stage. Not my purpose. Not really. I am thatI am. I am an ad-lib hierophant. I am the connection. My connection. Your connection. Their connection. Filled with clean, good pride, I find myself alone, cheerfully meandering about my personal, picture-perfect plateau.  

I am deep sadness. I am joy. I am as humble as can be. I am the god of thunder. And rock and roll. Still, I create. I create and create and create and create. I am the source, supreme. I am filled with sweet life. I am lord of death. I regulate. I plunder. I oppose lives. I am obedient. I have no choice. Humankind takes precarious shelter in my weary, roomy heart. Well, almost everyone.

I pinch myself and wake up in the midst of a miraculous storm. Typical summer day everywhere. Warm wind gusts. Industrious distortions rising up from the ground. Heavenly bodies so close…so close! 

Fire, fire, fire. One, two, three, and achievement. Burning mane. Fully sprung. Mature. Always ablaze. Still, deceptively reigning. Wow.

Hold on. I have just bluntly realized my intimate axiom, a long-lost friend. As of today, I no longer own the rights to my true self. I am overjoyed. Now I am doubtlessly and decisively alone.  

Hence, as I gracefully descend from my fiery pedestal I become one of you. I disappear. I disappear and grow. I become utter day-force. I become the wisdom contained within the comforting earth. Once again I create illusion. Illusion begetting illusion. Yeah, sure. Whatever. 

Here I go again. Great actor. Ah! The stage. In endless drama, in vivid, endless drama, I somehow make do. At least until I run out of encouragement. Then everyone will know. Ceilings and walls will be torn down in honor of my ascent. Scrupulously ambitious. I am the source, supreme.

Catastrophes. Cataclysms. Calamities. And annihilation. Dust settles. It always does. Humors are pacified. They always are. I look around. All I see is the writer. Down on the ground. Devastated. Destroyed. Demolished. Glistening in the morning sun. 

There are others. Children. Pleasures. Every single one. Identical in splendor. Covered in mud. Just like me. Once again, I feel bossy. I lost some, but I gained a great deal more. I won the unimaginable prize. I resisted, resisted, fought, and won. I won on sincere behalf of all. 

Then, a few more words were jotted down. It could have been residual disquietude. It could have been leftover martyrdom. No. Not me. I am incapable of such atrociousness. No. Not about me. I rest in peace in this very moment. I know. I am the source, supreme!

(Have I finally seen the light?)

Copyright © 2019 Intimate Mantra, LLC. All rights reserved



something juicy in the making (part 4) ...


Last Will And Testament


Please allow me to introduce myself. I was given a name at birth, but that’s not important. You can call me Joe Cool. I’m a hero. I’m at the helm. I do what I want. I’m special.

Yep, I’m an illusion. Deep down inside I know it. But who cares? I’m in control. Still in control…

I’m told I’m a disease. I’m told I impregnate the system, but how can that be? I’m NOTHING, really. I’m thought. I’m memory. I’m pure crystallization.

I’m static. I interpret. I judge. I always know what’s best. I always know what’s right. I’m selfish. So what? I don’t need anyone. I use others and others use me…

Sure, I have an agenda. And a busy agenda it is. I’m constantly justifying myself. I’m NOTHING. So what? As long as I’m in control, NOTHING else matters. I’m aggressive. I’m active. I’m influential. I tread on others. I’m spoiled. Did I tell you I’m in control? I’m illusion. I rebel. I fight. I scream. I howl. Still, nobody listens to me. No matter how much I cry, nobody cares. Duh. I’m NOTHING!

I’m limitation itself. Heck no. I’m endless within my illusion! I need to live. I’m immortal…until the day I die. Yep, I’ll die. So what? Everyone dies one day…

I’m structure. Or so I believe. I want to exist! I want to show off! I want to be important. I want to be acknowledged. I want to be acclaimed. I’m proactive. I’m always first in line. Or last, it doesn’t matter. As long as I get the attention I deserve. Always! I’m so childish…

I need to hang on. I need to survive. I’ll live forever. I’ll be remembered. Deep down inside, I know I do harm. So what? Everyone dies one day…

Body? What do you care? It’s mine, and mine alone. I take all my frustrations out on my body. It deserves to be punished. Who cares? One day I’ll die anyway…

Want to get to know me? No dice. I’ll hide as much as I can. And when my time comes, you won’t see me coming. No siree, Bob (Who the heck is Bob?). I’ll catch you by surprise. I’ll dump all my crap on you. Tough. I’m despicable. I’m manipulative. I’m arrogant. I’m blind…

I love blood. To hell with everything! I’m a tyrant, but sometimes I play the victim. I love seesaws. They bring me closer to people. Let the manhandling begin! Who cares? Everyone dies one day…

I’m really smart. I meet my needs and justify myself while I’m at it. I’m a sufferer. But then again, who isn’t? I’m entitled to my suffering. It earns me respect. It makes me proud. And when I’m knee-deep with suffering, I’ll be sure to beg for some more. Who cares? One day I’ll die anyway…

Cagey, cagey, cagey. I don’t need anyone else. I make up my own stories. I’m always fooling myself. Yep. That makes me happy. I’m happy because I’m always fooling myself. And whenever I’m sad, I have my excuses to cheer me up. That’s fine. That’s okay. Everything will be different next time. Hey, that’s what reincarnation is for, right? RIGHT? Until then, leave me alone. I’m suffering…and enjoying every last bit of it.

Somewhere within my shallowness I’m self-sufficient. I like this word. Shallowness. Well, what do you expect? I don’t want to drown. 

May all people conspire as they deem fit. Stop? Why stop? I don’t want to stop. I know I’m right! I must be right! An eye for an eye…blessed be Moses!

I love my stories. The world is filled with stories. Get lost. Let me express myself. Let me go on fooling myself. Let me go on contributing towards a crappier world. This way time goes by faster. This way I leave my mark on others. This way I can brand the cattle. Who cares? It’s always their fault anyway…

I hate mirrors.

I live in peace. I DO! I’m always imagining things. This way I won’t have to face the world. Who cares? The world is my oyster. And I want to eat it raw.

I love words. They're great. They're my refuge. They’re my weapons of choice. I live and thrive in a sea of words. Words are my shield against feelings. Well, feelings. Who needs feelings anyway?

My motto: much confusion and always on the move. And speaking of movement, which way is forward?

Now, where was I? Oh, yes, the words. I’m in command. Words are my tool. Words keep me safe and warm. Want to see?

Check this out. Watch me use words to get rid of my anger for good. I’m angry, I’m angry, I’m angry, I’m angry, I’m angry, I’m angry, I’m angry, ANGER, ANGER, ANGER, ANGER, ANGER, AAAAAAARGH! Phew. See? I’ve dealt with my anger and now it’s gone. See how easy that was? What? Don’t believe me? TOUGH! You’re lucky you’re not here. Otherwise I’d BEAT THE LIVING CRAP out of you!

Well, enough talking. It’s time to lock myself down. It’s time to shut down. Yes. Shutting down makes me stronger. This is how I build my castles. Strong sheltering. Solid walls. No foundation whatsoever, but who cares?

No, wait. I think I’ll go on babbling. I feel better this way. Why do you say I’m afraid? I’m not afraid! I’ll just go on and on and on and on and on. I’m ruthless. I’m independent. I don’t need anything. I don’t need anyone. I’ll just move on. Of course I might stop every once in a while. I’m only human. Of course I might stop for a second to drink a little or smoke a little or have that sweet. 

What? It’s bad for me? Well piss off! How can I go on if I’m deprived of the small pleasures in life? How can I survive? How? How? Survive?

Oops, too late. I’m dead.

Copyright © 2019 Intimate Mantra, LLC. All rights reserved


channeling session


channeling session

Esteemed earthling,

In view of the current circumstances, we felt the need to provide you with a few clarifications and suggestions. We sincerely hope they are enough to boost your energy levels a bit. After all, you look exhausted. And it has only been a few days…

1. First and foremost…

Please go easy on yourself. Eat well, drink plenty of water, get enough rest, find some "me" time, take deep breaths.

Be out in nature. Nature recharges your system. Be in contact with animals. Animals remind you of unconditional love. Animals reflect your true nature.

2. Then…

Do what you need to do. If you feel you must, by all means keep informed, but try not to get into pointless arguments.

It’s no use trying to change others. More often than not, forcibly imposing your point of view on others only makes them more entrenched in their beliefs.

Avoid getting together with likeminded people to complain about the circumstances. Chances are you will accomplish nothing but the intensification and propagation of negative thoughts and emotions.

Brace yourself: You could be in for a long ordeal.

3. The situation…

A major lesson here is acceptance. See that what is happening is already here and has been accepted in the collective field of awareness.

Paradigm shift is a strong possibility. Like everything else in a world of duality, paradigms come and go.

A social paradigm is a collective group mind. A social paradigm is a collective mental pattern. It is a way of thinking adopted by the majority and, although it has no independence existence, it has a life of its own. It is like a crowd.

The current social paradigm has been fully exposed in its absurdity. It had been hiding in plain sight, but now it has come out, kicking, screaming. It has been bursting with extremism and aggressiveness like a cornered animal.

Make no mistake. The dominant paradigm will fight for dear life until the very end. It might even take the entire world down with it.

The current situation is much beyond political parties or perspectives. Its true resolution depends on radical change in mentality.

Those representing the dominant paradigm are just pawns. They are just playing their part. Without them this worn out mindset would not be in such clear evidence. Without them the dominant paradigm would not have been called out so blatantly.

Deep down you knew this was going to happen, sooner or later. It really is a good thing that crisis is out like a full-blown inflammation. The dominant paradigm had been slowly but surely killing everyone and everything on this earth.

4. The opportunity…

An invaluable opportunity presents itself. A critical mass of people carrying a new set of values could upgrade the collective mindset.

This implies that the possibility of a shift in social paradigm depends on a shift in individual paradigms.

It is uncertain how much longer the dominant paradigm will last. Even the notion of social paradigm is open for questioning and scholarly discussions. But a shift in your own mindset is a reality, a necessity, and the good news is that it solely depends on you.

You need to ask yourself if you are willing to move beyond the current mindset of competition and scarcity toward a gentler perspective, one where collaboration and sufficiency are the norm.

You need to ask yourself if you are willing to give up accumulation and embrace allocation.

You need to ask yourself if you are willing to go from separation to inclusion.

You have possibly reached a point where something's finally got to give. And what's got to give is the old you. You are being called to take a hard look inside. You are being called to examine your motives, your behavior, your very identity.

5. Assurance…

No matter which side of the fence you're on, if you commit deeply to your own inner work, then no matter what happens, success is guaranteed, because it only depends on you.

6. Change…

Change can be scary. Change can make you shrink in fear. But change can also take you to the other side. Change is inevitable. Change is an aspect of the natural cycle of life and death.

You can only change the world by changing your world.

If I change, you change, he changes, she changes, they change, eventually the entire thing shifts. But the changes were really individual.

Reaction does not lead to change. Reaction only leads to more reaction.

7. Back to basics…

Time to face the fact that what goes on outside is a reflection of your inner workings.

When you blame others, you avoid looking at your own shadow. When you blame others, you deny responsibility for your own feelings. When you blame others, you relinquish your personal power.

8. The how-tos…

Neutralizing a mental pattern is a painful, but simple process. You need to take a good look at unexamined motives. You need to start questioning unquestioned answers. You need to look within with purpose, courage, and honesty.

Are you angry? Depressed? Disheartened? Desperate? Instead of reacting, learn to stop and observe. Sit still and allow whatever has presented itself to fully manifest before your mind’s eye. Allow whatever has presented itself to live its life fully. Then, and only then, will it be able to leave you for good. Then, and only then will it be able to die in peace.

Powerlessness is just another ugly facet of the old dualistic mindset. If you feel powerless, embrace the feeling. Accept. It’s really all you can do. Anything else is just a temporary measure, an executive order…

9. The understanding…

Once you've worked on yourself and start living from your heart, from what you truly feel is right and makes you feel good, your role in this mess will manifest clearly and effortlessly.

The heart is not new age mumbo jumbo. The heart is who you really are behind the selfish play. The heart is your true nature.

The heart allows you to see clearly that community functions better than the individual. The heart allows you to see clearly that everyone is created equal. The heart allows you to see clearly that solidarity makes you feel good. The heart allows you to see clearly that generosity is more rewarding than greed.

10. Oh, my God…

If you place your hopes on God, if you believe God is punishing you or humanity, if you think God is having a laugh while you suffer, then God is just an idea in your head.

God is not at all what you think. Not at all. God is the road, not the map. God is the food, not the menu. God is the moon, not the finger. God is impossibly inconceivable, yet it is closer than your most intimate secret.

God is you, and everybody else. God is every animal, vegetable, mineral. God is every spec of dust in the universe…and more. God is potential. God is actualization. God is possibility. God is here, now.

God can only act through you. And you. And you. And you. And you. And you. And you. And you. And you. And you. Please keep that in mind.

11. Activism…

Organization, resistance, and action are great options. But remember, above all, this is about inner transformation.

We need to repeat this again and again. Please realize what happens outside is a reflection of our inner workings.

This does not mean you are suddenly in love with all beings. This does not mean you won’t act. It means that whatever you do will come from the bottom of the bottom of your heart. And the heart is never wrong.

You can go on marches, donate money, you can resist all you want, but if you continue with the blame, the hatred, the projections, and the violence, you are doomed. No matter which side of the fence you’re on, you are still part of the old paradigm.

12. More choices…

Time to start making better choices. Time to be responsible. Time to be mature. Time to defend and support those who are working toward a better world, toward equality, toward peace and equal rights, toward better treatment and better wages, toward mutual respect, toward love, toward social justice.

Time to make smart choices on who supplies your food, where you get your clothes, and how you get around.

Time to consider energy sources. Time to use energy responsibly.

Not only time to agree, but time to engage.

13. And in the end…

From a truly pragmatic perspective, it really doesn't matter if this is the last breath of an old paradigm or if a new, uglier world order is imminent, or even if you are quickly marching to your doom.

The only thing that matters is getting to know yourself in very concrete and practical terms, here and now. Trust me on this.